[MISSION] Of Faith, Trust and Pixie Dust (pt. 3)

The team is united, but more trouble awaits.

Warning for in-fic objectionable content: bestiality (in a Smauging Tinker Bell fic). The writer of this post does not endorse the contents and views put forth by the work of fiction being parodied in it.

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The fic referenced/cited in this story, titled "Mouse mating", belongs to ElectricPixie410 and they're welcome to keep or do anything they want with it – even if it's pointlessly disgusting. Let us hope Disney never finds out about it.

The following text is a work of parody/satire that contains literary analysis.

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Acorn Summit map in Pixie Hollow Online

"Oi, yer jokin' right?" Urato said, futilely trying to shake Kaguya awake in panic. "C'mon, say sumthin'! What da heck's goin' on? Wake up!"

Kaguya finally moved his mouth, but could only let out faint unintelligible noises. This didn't seem to be a problem for Momoka however. "A… mouse?" she asked. "What do you mean? What mouse?"

A piercing scream from Helena put an end to the interrogation session. The awake agents soon wished they'd never seen whatever it was that frightened her so; far below, amidst maple trees crimson and gold, amidst subtle scents of acorn cookies and honey-baked apples, a horrific spectacle happened.

Fawn got on her knees and lifted her skirt, revealing her bare behind. The mouse crawled behind her and lifted himself on top of her. Then it inserted it's you-know-what inside her.

"What the…" Urato uttered, mouth almost unable to close. Momoka's face registered even more intense horror, and she scrambled to shield her unconscious master's eyes from taking in any more of the abomination.

"I definitely don't think this is in our fic. The intel report didn't mention anything about… this," she said, wanting to look away but couldn't.

"Dun think it's in ours either," Urato answered. "Do ya think…"

"What on earth are you waiting for? A canon character is doing unspeakable things with a mouse!" Inasuke yelled at them. If he was merely annoyed before, he was now incensed. "Isn't it bad enough that we have to take on a third fic? How can something like this be allowed to take place in Disney? I can't take this anymore, this thing is dying a violent death!"

He took the Fictionary from Momoka, then swooped down and started to whack both Fawn and the mouse on the heads with it. "In the name of Disney, I banish foul badfic spirit! Keep this blight off Tinker Bell canon! Keep pointlessly disgusting garbage out of childrens' movies!" he cried, his loudness echoing through the woods.

He only stopped to catch his breath after both Fawn and the mouse were unconscious, the badfic spirits exorcised from them – but things were far from over. His companions joined him, and so did two other fairies: Sheen the dust-talent OC and Jadina the Sue. "Did something happen? I heard a lot of screaming just now," the former said, but he was ignored. The sight of the Sue fanned anger in Inasuke again, and he started ranting once more as though his previous outburst never happened.

"You! Don't think I've forgotten about you! I can't believe any of this anymore! Are you all trying to drive me stark raving mad? Two Mary Sues and mouse sex, what has the world come to?"

"Mouse what?" the OC named Sheen asked, but he still went unheard. The rest of the group had more pressing matters to focus on: Inasuke was angrier than he'd ever been, and Kaguya was still barely conscious. It had been an especially chaotic day.

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Up on the highest branch of a random tree, six fairies were situated – the Four Demonly Kings alongside two OCs from two different fics. Before them, two solid glitter constructs known as Mary Sues were bound and put in sacks, awaiting their conviction and eventual demise.

The sound of soaring hawks in the distance did not go unheard.

"First off, Princess Elphaba," Inasuke started, rage still seething in his voice. "You are convicted of replacing Tinker Bell; directly contradicting canon regarding fairy birth; being needlessly angsty and weepy in a lighthearted, optimistic movie series; making yourself a princess; having a terrible sense of fashion in one of the most beautiful settings of all time; and creating minis. Now as for… what's her name, Shigisawa-sempai?" he briefly turned to ask Momoka, who was still clutching unconscious Kaguya as though her life depended on him. "Jadina, you are charged with not having a talent and having every talent at the same time; creating a delinquent group in Pixie Hollow; effortlessly withstanding the Winter Woods; and creating a huge number of minis. Both of you are charged with being Mary Sues and missing the point of the Tinker Bell movies; Tink's story is never about being more special than everyone else and making everyone bow at your feet and worship your sheer awesomeness. It's about being flawed, having limitations and taking responsibility for your actions, get it through your thick skulls!"

Helena and Sheen just stared speechless at this angry brown-haired Scout, while Momoka was torn between fretting about her master and about Inasuke. While not unconscious like Kaguya, the mouse fic had clearly gotten to him. He would have ranted on a bit more if Urato hadn't alerted the group of a hawk quickly swooping their way, and they evacuated the branch while the Sues were devoured in a glittery death.

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"Seriously, man. What even da funk are ye?" Urato deadpanned after he and Inasuke were safe and sound in their RC. Far from enraged and shouting, the latter was now relaxed and laughing in the middle of a pile of hand-sewn plushes, Booky cuddled in his arms.

"Ahh, what heaven," Inasuke said, while Booky nuzzled his face. "You try telling me this isn't the best thing ever after three crazy fics. The crazier the mission is, the better it feels when you get home. Besides, we've inducted two new recruits; the higher-ups are gonna reward us big for our hard work."

"Watch out, ya gunna be like Guyatchi," Urato said – and the mention of Kaguya's name immediately made him remember something important. "Speaking of him…"

Indeed, just outside the fickle door to their RC, the agents of RC 381 were nowhere near as relieved and relaxed as they were. Unlike usual, Kaguya hadn't returned to his senses; he yet remained in metaphorical BSoD, unresponsive to his maid's desperate calls.

(fin)

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Minis:

• Pixy

• Pixy Dust (adopted by Linstar)

• Pixy Hollow

• tinkerbells

• rosett

• tark (from Trak)

• Dewy (from Dewey)

• Cindy (from Cinda)

• Liesel (from Lisel)

• Duncan (from Dunkin)

• Scarlet (from Scarlett)

• Tinkerbelle

• pixie hallow

• main land

• tinker hollow

Rescued characters (NOT up for adoption):

• Helena

• Sheen